Jokes About Baldness

10 + Jokes About Baldness That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

If you’re looking for some hilarious jokes about baldness, you’ve come to the right place! Whether you’re bald yourself or you know someone who is, these 10 jokes about baldness will definitely make you laugh out loud. From lighthearted jabs to good-natured ribbing, these jokes about bald and balding will bring a smile to anyone’s face. So get ready to chuckle, giggle, and guffaw – it’s time for some jokes about baldness!

Hey there! Some links on this page are affiliate links which means that, if you choose to make a purchase, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I greatly appreciate your support!

Jokes About Baldness

Bald jokes have long been a staple in comedic routines and are often directed at men. However, many women experience hair loss as well, so it’s important to keep this in mind when joking about baldness. 

As a bald man, I’ve heard all sorts of jokes about being bald over the years. 

The purpose of this post is to look at some of the best and worst bald jokes on the internet. From jokes about receding hairlines to jokes about hair loss, this list has something for everyone. 

Whether you’re looking for ammunition to roast your bald friends or just want to prepare yourself for jokes you might hear, you’ll find what you’re looking for here. 

When Will Smith slapped Chris Rock for making a bald joke at the Oscars, old footage of Will Smith delivering a bald joke resurfaced. It was one of the funniest bald jokes I’ve ever heard.

Will Smith makes a bald joke during an appearance on “The Arsenio Hall Show” directed at someone with alopecia.


The video is authentic. Will Smith made a sexist joke on “The Arsenio Hall Show” in 1991. However, there is no evidence that this joke was meant for someone suffering from alopecia. Smith smacked Chris Rock during an Oscars telecast after he made a bald joke about Smith’s wife, who actually have alopecia areata, and the miscaptioned film went viral.

Is it true that Will Smith once did the same thing — make a bald joke directed at someone with alopecia — that drove him to slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars? While some social media users believe Smith’s behaviour at the Oscars was particularly hypocritical, there is no evidence to substantiate the idea that a viral video clip from “The Arsenio Hall Show” includes a man with alopecia.

On March 28, the day after Will Smith slapped Rock at the Oscars form making a bald joke directed at Jada Pinkett Smith (who was diagnosed with alopecia in 2018), a video appeared to show Smith making a similar joke during an appearance on “The Arsenio Hall Show.” On Twitter, one viral version of this video was shared with the caption: “He needs to wax his head every morning.” This is a video of Will Smith cracking a joke about someone suffering from alopecia. One of the reasons I like the internet is that it never forgets.”

While this video is genuine, there is no evidence that Smith’s joke was meant for someone suffering from baldness.

The film looks to be from an episode of “The Arsenio Hall Show” dated February 1991. Smith jokes about Hall’s bassist, John B. Williams, in the clip, saying, “he has a rule, the bass player, he has to wax his head every morning.” Below is an extended version of Smith’s appearance on “The Arsenio Hall Show” in 1991. Around the 6:30 mark, there is a bald joke.

While Smith made a bald joke during her presentation, there is no proof that Williams, like Pinkett Smith, suffers from alopecia. Alopecia, the medical word for hair loss, manifests itself in a variety of ways. Pinkett Smith is said to have alopecia areata, often known as spot baldness, which causes splotchy regions of hair loss on both the head and the body. Male-pattern baldness is a more common kind of alopecia (androgenetic alopecia).

You also like: Jeff Ross with Alopecia making funny joke about the the Oscars Slap!

Best bald jokes

Bald jokes may not be to everyone’s tastes, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a few laughs about them. Here are some of the best bald jokes around: 

“What do you call a bunch of bunnies who are jumping backwards? A receding hareline.”

“Don’t waste money on hair restorer. Just paint a series of little rabbits on your bald head. From a distance, they look like hares.” 

“What do you call making fun of Jada Smith in front of Will? A bald move.” 

“Why do bald people who look forward to sunny days so much? It is now their turn to shine.”

“What is the term for a balding web developer? A 404-head.””What do you call a bald chair? A ‘c’.” 

Whether it’s bald jokes roast or jokes about bald people, there’s something for everyone when it comes to jokes about receding hairlines or hair loss. So don’t be afraid to share a few laughs with friends and family over some good-natured bald jokes or puns. Who knows? Will Smith might even make fun of a bald guy, and you might just be in on the joke!

Terrible bald jokes (are these even jokes?)

Some of the jokes about bald people I’ve read or heard are quite horrifying. It’s as if someone tried really hard to find a joke about someone being bald and falling a little flat. Still, maybe one of your friends will find these bad bald jokes amusing.

I’m not claiming my friend’s hair is falling out, but lice are protesting deforestation.

What do you name lice on a bald man’s head? Homeless.

What did a man who didn’t have any hair respond when he got a comb for his birthday? Thank you; I’ll never give it up.

Why do bald people not use keys? Because they lack any locks.

I didn’t realise I was losing my hair until I asked my barber to cut it, and he inquired, “which one?”

Why was there such a fuss over the bald man’s will? He didn’t have any heirs, and it turns out.

Why is it so easy to predict what a bald man would say? Because you can literally see what they’re thinking!

The best part about being tall and bald is that everyone thinks you’re tall.

What did one man tell a pal with a thinning hairline? “I can see that your head surely has a brighter future than mine”.

When you wear a turtle neck, you appear like a roll-on deodorant.

I can look into the future by rubbing your naked head.

Doctor, doctor, my hair is falling out; can you recommend something to keep it in place? Yes, I have a paper bag.

doctor hair falling out joke

Bald males are thought to be more virile. The difficulty is that they never get the chance to demonstrate it.

On a windy day, what do you call a bald man? Fortunate.

Why are people so concerned about the current recession? They are afraid of going bald.

Why are all the sinners who have died bald? Because they’ve got hell toupee.

What happened in the squabble between a bald man and his hair? They had a squabble.

What should you avoid saying when fighting with a bald person? Remove my hair.

A man with three hairs visits the barbershop. “I want a trim, then one to the left, one to the right, and one down the middle,” he says. The barber is scrutinised, but one of his hair slips out. “OK,” the guy responds, “do the trimming, and I’ll have one to the left and one to the right.” A second hair has fallen out. “Never mind,” the guy adds, “just leave it a mess.”

Men with bald patches on their heads are brilliant thinkers, while men with bald patches on their backs are fantastic lovers. Men who are bald on top and back believe they are terrific lovers.

Best bald comedians

Bald comedians rarely make jokes about their baldness, but they may allude to it. However, there are some fantastic bald comedians, and it’s worth noting how many of the best comedians don’t have hair.

Bill Burr

Bill Burr is a well-known standup comedian and comedy actor who has been performing standup for over 30 years. He has several Netflix specials and has been in numerous movies and TV shows.

Here’s a clip from his podcast in which he discusses becoming bald in his own unique style:

George Carlin

George Carlin, a well-known and renowned comedian (with a foul tongue), was widely recognised as one of the most influential standup comedians of all time.

Despite his own hair loss, he wasn’t a fan of white guys cutting their heads bald, as this old clip shows:

Dave Chapelle

Dave Chapelle, widely regarded as one of the world’s top comedians, has worked in sketch comedy and standup, as well as film and television roles.

He’s received numerous honours, and while he’s sparked some controversy, he still has enormous popularity among both the general audience and other comics.

Jeff Ross

Jeff Ross has had some… odd hairstyles over his roast comedian career, but he has recently embraced the bald look. He doesn’t make many jokes about it, but he gets a lot of them – that’s the core of roast comedy, which focuses on insults.

Dara O’Briain

O’Briain is an Irish comedian who is most known in the United Kingdom, despite having completed multiple global tours. He also presents panel events, and various science shows in addition to standup. He is frequently the target of jokes from other panellists, including those concerning his head – though more about its size than its baldness.

Steve Harvey

Harvey is a TV show host, actor, and comedian most known for his job as Household Feud host, where he frequently has to deal with queries and jokes about bald heads.

Is it acceptable to make jokes about bald people?

It depends on the setting and whether it’s appropriate to make jokes about bald people. You should really not make a joke about someone’s baldness unless you know somebody well and know they’ll take it in the intended spirit. Many people are sensitive to hair loss, and spiteful baldness jokes are discriminatory.

Context is everything here, but if you’re among friends and love insulting one another for fun, and you know the bald people in your group aren’t bothered by their baldness, it’s fine to make those comments.

You shouldn’t do anything else. You should not make baldness jokes to persons you don’t know or who may be sensitive to their baldness. When you think about it, it’s actually quite cruel.

This was reported on a UK morning news broadcast in 2019; there was a debate about whether making jokes about baldness was inappropriate. This arose when Gary Lineker, a famous soccer player and sports show broadcaster, made some comments about his coworkers on air.

Here’s the discussion:

Here are the jokes, should you wish to assess them for yourself:

You’ll notice that the commentators who are being made fun of accept them in good humour; in fact, one of them can’t help but chuckle.


Bald jokes have been around for quite some time and are often more about nicknames or insults than punchlines. Whether or not these jokes are acceptable is a matter of personal taste; if someone pushes the limits, ask them if they would say the same thing to Jason Statham. From best bald jokes to jokes about hair loss, there are many kinds of bald jokes out there, such as bald jokes roast, jokes about bald people, jokes about receding hairline, and even jokes where Will Smith makes fun of a bald guy.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *